


A Delicate Balance

by fypical



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Cuddling & Snuggling, Disney Movies, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-02
Updated: 2014-01-02
Packaged: 2018-01-07 05:38:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,502
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1116156
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fypical/pseuds/fypical
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Cas is curled up on the sofa under a blanket, looking very small. Something in Sam’s chest goes sort of sideways. (fluff and cuddling and disney movies of the sastiel variety, winter/christmas-style)</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Delicate Balance

Christmas isn’t something Sam really celebrates. Before, it was because of hunts or fights that seemed more important than Christmas – and really, even the attempt at Christmas he and Dean had before Dean went to Hell wasn’t quite a celebration, even if it was a nice change.

 

So it’s weird to come out of his bedroom and hear Christmas carols echoing around the bunker. He knows Dean’s out on one of his super secret solo hunts – even though it’s been weeks since the angel that Dean apparently tricked Sam into agreeing to got ejected and Sam really does feel fine. And, okay, Cas has been hovering around him more often lately, but Sam figures that’s because Cas saved his life.

 

Dean hasn’t told Sam much about the angel, just that he’d been lying about who he was. Sam knew already about Kevin, and he doesn’t like to think about it (it’s too much like Lucifer, and that’s not a line of thought he wants to go down). He thinks maybe Cas knows more than he does, but Cas has been preoccupied with whatever new angel war’s going on.

 

It’s Cas who greets him with a very tiny smile and a cup of coffee when Sam finally reaches the kitchen – he’s still not sure where the music’s coming from, because it isn’t the kitchen – and Sam’s content to lean against the counter while Cas meanders around the bunker. He hasn’t been in the bunker much, so Sam thinks he’s maybe exploring; until he comes back, anyway, and Sam can feel Cas’s eyes on him again.

 

“I thought there was a war,” Sam says after a few moments of being observed, because he’s terrible at small talk unless the job demands it. Cas nods and glances at the floor.

 

“There’s been…something of a lull,” he replies, speaking to his feet (covered only in socks, which makes him look strangely vulnerable to Sam). He sounds guilty, but Sam’s pretty glad he came back to the bunker instead of like last time, when he only showed up when they needed him and didn’t tell them anything.

 

“Good,” he says, “you need the break.”

 

They all need a break, but Sam always worries more about Cas than he does about himself – he’s been in the game for a while, and he knows Cas knows war better than he and Dean ever could, but he sometimes doesn’t act like it. And Sam knows from experience that facing that much opposition alone isn’t easy.

 

“There is a channel that’s showing a series of Disney films,” Cas replies; he’s pretty good at non-sequiturs, Sam’s found, but before he can ask what that has to do with anything (let alone the precarious fate of the world), Cas is continuing.

 

“I was planning on watching the next film, it starts soon. Would you like to join me?”

 

Cas is a lot more straightforward than anyone Sam’s ever known – and he’s not sure if it’s an occupational hazard of being an angel, or if it’s just how Cas is. He knows there are other angels who aren’t nearly as to the point (two in particular) as Cas, so he thinks maybe it’s just that he’s really good at getting to the point, too.

 

Sam hasn’t watched a Disney movie in years, and the last time he saw one, it was just because it happened to be on TV in it was Disney or porn; the humour isn’t lost on Sam now and wasn’t then, either.

 

“Uh, sure.” He shrugs a shoulder, and Cas smiles – oddly brightly, for him – and then turns on his heel and makes his way into the living room. Sam thinks he’s probably smiling, too, as he tops up his coffee and makes enough toast for both of them. By the time he makes it into the living room, the Christmas music has been replaced by the credit music of what seems to be Aladdin, and Cas is curled up on the sofa under a blanket, looking very small.

 

Something in Sam’s chest goes sort of sideways, and he just barely manages to balance the toast and coffee the rest of the way to the sofa. It’s cold in the bunker (they have heating, but it’s still a concrete building underground), so he’s not sure why he’s so taken aback by seeing Cas bundled up the way he is.

 

He steals some of the blanket on impulse, risking an offended look from Cas, but Cas seems to accept the toast as a peace offering. He’s sort of like a cat in some ways, Sam thinks as Aladdin’s credits breathe their last, and Sam might like dogs better than cats when it comes to the animals, but he’s liked Cas since the day they met – despite everything they’ve done to one another.

 

Or maybe because of it. He isn’t sure.

 

The channel must be doing the movies in chronological order, because it’s The Lion King that appears on screen – and Sam doesn’t even know how he knows the chronological order of Disney movies except for the fact that he remembers when The Lion King came out.

 

It’s maybe not the best movie for them to watch – Sam knows enough to know it’s based on Hamlet and that’s probably too close to home for both he and Cas – but the music’s good and Sam doesn’t actually remember the last time he saw it, so it’s easy enough to ignore the plot and only focus on the nostalgia. Besides, Cas seems into it.

 

Somewhere around Hakuna Matata, Sam finds that Cas has shifted over nearer to him. They’ve been dancing around…something for years, Sam thinks (anyone who isn’t Dean who threatens Satan for him is definitely dancing around something), and if the world’s going to Hell again he’s not going to be pushing people away from him until it happens. So he puts an arm out and tugs Cas a little closer.

 

Cas seems pretty okay with it, since he relaxes against Sam and lets out a little sigh.  It’s nice, actually, to have someone next to him, and Cas is warm and smells like the sky (and like the generic soap they buy in bulk out of habit). Sam keeps his arm around Cas’s shoulder for the rest of the movie, and at some point he finds that Cas has curled an arm around him. He’s pretty sure this sort of thing hasn’t happened since university, which is saying something.

 

Sam doesn’t have an issue with cuddling, really; he knows (from far too much second-hand experience with Dean’s sex life) that Dean hates it or at least acts like he does, and he figured maybe angels wouldn’t like it either since they’re some kind of complex quantum equations without their vessels. Cas seems to be into it, though.

 

When the credits are rolling, Sam shifts slightly; he’s been sitting in one place for longer than he’s used to and he’s sure that hunting hasn’t been great for his body (his joints are sometimes stiffer than they should be for someone who’s thirty, but it’s an occupational hazard; at least he’s alive). Cas glances up at him with sort of sleepy eyes and maybe he’s thinking the same as Sam, because Sam doesn’t have any other explanation for him leaning up and kissing the corner of Sam’s mouth.

 

Sam makes a sort of strangled involuntary noise and Cas immediately goes about four different shades of pink, which is really unfair. Sam has to lean down and kiss Cas properly for it, at an awkward angle until they both move enough to reach one another. Cas’s hands are warm and one of them is in Sam’s hair and when they break apart, Cas presses his forehead to Sam’s. Sam knows he’s grinning like an idiot and he can’t bring himself to care.

 

Cas reaches for the remote and changes the channel to something equally mindless but slightly less kid-oriented – Sam doesn’t even know what it is, not that he’s all that focused on the television right now – and settles back against Sam, pressing a kiss to his jaw.

 

They stay like that for pretty much the rest of the day, watching TV neither of them cares about and trading kisses. When Dean finally shows up, hidden behind a mountain of groceries (obviously the super secret hunt went well enough that he didn’t come straight back and collapse), Sam feels like they should maybe pretend like nothing happened, but Cas stays right where he is.

 

The look they get from Dean is somewhere between relieved and confused, and when Cas laces his finger with Sam’s under the blanket, smiling slightly, Sam feels like he might actually be able to call the bunker home with some kind of certainty. It's a feeling he hasn't had in years; Cas rests his head against Sam's shoulder, and Sam decides he's going to hang on to it with all he's got.

 

He deserves it. They all do.

**Author's Note:**

> This is a birthday present for Sa (jaredstinynipples @ tumblr) and it is 10000% fluff and maybe like 10% Disney movies making Sam feel weird about his destiny. The title is from Mufasa's speech to Simba about respecting the balance of nature. Appropos for both Cas and Sam, I think.
> 
> Happy birthday/merry Christmas/happy new year Sa! (Also, this is the first time I've ever written Sam/Cas, I'm very happy to have done so tbh)


End file.
